Funny Girlfriend Quotes – Hilarious to Make You Laugh

Funny girlfriend quotes: It is a set of funny girlfriend quotes that give you deep love, and we hope you will be happy with your beloved.  Apply the idea directly in your life and thus be a little happier. You can also dedicate them to the girlfriend. With these excellent thoughts, you can fun with your girlfriend.

Funny girlfriend quotes:

  1. My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. – Joan Rivers
  2. I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. – Groucho Marx
  3. A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt. – Spanish Proverb
  4. Romantic love is a mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one. – Fran Lebowitz
  5. Don’t make love by the garden gate, love is blind but the neighbors ain’t.

My gentle and affectionate, as it sometimes happens to me from your kind hearth, I need so little for happiness, sincere words that full the soul from which the wings behind my back open. When I hear your voice in the phone receiver I want to fly, run, jump from happiness and run to you, to your hands. To your really hot, open heart. Feeling that you need me, you need whoever I am, just because you have me in your destiny.

  1. Marriage is like pantyhose. It all depends on what you put into it. – Phyllis Schlafly
  2. Love is telling someone that his zipper is open or her wig looks too fake.
  3. What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About pounds. – Cindy Garner
  4. It is not love that makes a relationship complicated; it’s the people in it who do.
  5. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. – Albert Einstein
  6. Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses. – Thomas Dewar

Funny love quotes for girlfriend:

  1. Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there. – George Burns
  2. I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it. – Elizabeth Evans
  3. The four most important words in any marriage. I’ll do the dishes.
  4. All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt. – Charles M. Schulz
  5. Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery. – Fulton J. Sheen
  6. Promise yourself not to be a woman who needs a man to live, but a woman a man needs.

Many believe that female friendship is a special female-specific friendship dream. This point of view is particularly common, of course, among men. In their opinion, all women among themselves are not friends and competitors. In order to verify these words, we have selected Funny girlfriend quotes. They should help us understand what women’s friendship is, and who are real friends.

  1. You will always be my : and the name I write in my naughty list.
  2. Girls cry their eyes out until they are dry, while boys drink their beers until their mugs are all dried up.
  3. I wish there’s a traffic light to tell me when to stop, go and slow down when I took this road of falling in love.
  4. I want to be your sweet good morning, your lovely good night and your most painful goodbye.
  5. Stop waiting for your prince in a white horse. Go and find him. The poor bastard might be lost, stuck in an island or something.
  6. You’re like my old car. It used to drive me crazy. I Love You!
  7. I have to say babe, your choices are the best! You chose me, didn’t you?
  8. A person in love partly becomes a poet, a composer and the corniest person in the room.
  9. I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. — Rita Rudner

Funny quotes about your girlfriend:

  1. I miss crawling into a man’s arm, kissing his neck, saying those three little words into his ear, ‘And another thing …’” — Felicia Michaels
  2. Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in. — Richard Jeni​​
  3. Love is a lot like a backache: it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there. — George Burns
  4. I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. — Groucho Marx
  5. I can’t make you love me, but I can fill my pantry with your favorite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $ — Rob Delaney
  6. Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing. — Natasha Leggero
  7. Love is fun but, it is not going to pay the bills. – Jessica Martin
  8. Chocolates first, kisses second.
  9. It wasn’t love at first sight. It took a full five minutes. – Lucille Ball
  10. You can disagree with me all you want because, at the end of the day, we’re two individuals. I cannot force you to be right.
  11. Our relationship will always be a two-way street as long as both ways are peppered with gifts for me.

Funny girlfriend captions:

  1. I know sometimes I can be a demanding girlfriend. But that’s why you’ve got hours a day to hustle.
  2. Our relationship is simple. You do what I say, and I say what you have to do.
  3. Sometimes I wish you were as generous with your wallet as God has been generous with your looks.
  4. Our relationship is based on one simple ground rule. You break my heart, I break your jaw.
  5. I promise, I’ll never ever ask you to give me money. Except, when I go shopping.
  6. I promise I’ll never be a high maintenance girlfriend as long as you promise never to be a dud of a boyfriend.
  7. Our relationship is a two-way street. As long as both ways lead to me.
  8. Love is sharing your popcorn.~ Charles Schultz

Of course, funny girlfriend quotes represent different points of view on the issue of girlfriends, but, in any case, a person – a social being, and he need to communicate, and communication should be different. Well, a real women’s communication with one woman can only give another woman. Remember that, and appreciate your friends.

  1. You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That is your common sense leaving your body.
  2. I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.
  3. I solemnly swear I am up to no good. Especially when I am all alone with you!
  4. You want to know who I’m in love with? Read the first word again.
  5. I love you with all my belly. I would say heart, but my belly is bigger.
  6. I’d definitely fight a care bear for you.
  7. Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.~ Franklin P. Jones
  8. Will you lend me a kiss? I promise to give it back.
  9. Always follow your heart, but remember to bring your brain along!
  10. I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?
  11. Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I’m with you!
  12. Good thing I brought my library card because I’m totally checking you out.
  13. In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.
  14. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
  15. Love is being stupid together.~ Paul Valery
  16. Love; A temporary insanity curable by marriage.~ Ambrose Bierce
  17. You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I’m scared!
  18. You’re just like bacon, beer and chocolate – you make everything better.
  19. Let’s flip a coin. Heads, I’m yours. Tails, you’re mine.
  20. I love you more than beer, and I really love beer.
  21. I love you even when I’m really, really hungry.

Funny quotes for my girlfriend:

  1. I love you from my head tomatoes.
  2. You add meaning to my life and yet, you subtract some cash from my wallet.
  3. I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.~ Rita Rudner
  4. Promise yourself not to be a woman who needs a man to live, but a woman a man needs.
  5. Stop waiting for your prince on a white horse. Go and find him. The poor man might be lost or stuck on an island or something.
  6. What’s the best way to have your husband remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.~ Cindy Garner
  7. Forever is a long time, make sure you spend it with someone who makes you laugh!
  8. An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.~ Agatha Christie
  9. Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.~ Phyllis Diller
  10. Every girl deserves a guy that can make her smile even when she doesn’t want to.
  11. Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man that I want my children to spend their weekends with?~ Rita Rudner
  12. Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.~ Mae West
  13. Love is a two-way street constantly under construction.~ Carroll Bryant
  14. Remember, beneath every cynic there lies a romantic, and probably an injured one.~ Benjamin Franklin
  15. I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.~ Steven Wright
  16. Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?~ Groucho Marx

You taught me how to live and love myself! You taught me to smile at all my problems! You’re the girl I live for! The most beautiful, the best moments of my life are connected to you! We’ve built everything for ourselves, left to live together!

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